USB for health and moral management

Written by Paper. Posted in Drive, Technology

USB for health and moral management

Published on August 23, 2016 with No Comments

In a twist on an old joke, Jesus and Satan were working on their computers when a lightning bolt caused both computers to crash. It seems this was back in the day before automatic backup and restore. So Satan could not recover his work while Jesus was up and running with no worries. The reason being – drum roll here – Jesus saves. Ugh. In a completely unrelated topic, the Jonas brothers have recently endorsed the new Bayer Contour USB diabetes device.
Similar to any common USB device, the Bayer Contour has a connector on one end and a slot for glucose test strips on the other end. After users plug the device into their computers they can track trends in glucose levels. As for the Jonas brothers’ angle? Nick Jonas is a “diabetic celebrity.” Medical alert celebrities already know of the MedicTag USB that stores a wealth of information for ease of care during an emergency.
But wait, there’s more. Schools, churches, parents and employers now have a new morality USB tool. The Porn Detection stick is a USB device that can be used to detect pornographic images on computers. Simply plug the device into the suspected computer and it launches a skin detection program. Too much skin and – busted. It can scan a 500 gig hard drive in less than two hours.
However, all is not simple in the skin detection computing world. There are algorithms that detect a large volume of flesh tones on an object – and given the diversity of flesh tones it isn’t clear what this means. Regardless, cardboard boxes and other unlikely objects have been determined as “questionable images,” requiring a human viewer to confirm the existence of porn. Now just who are these humans going into the porn detection confirmation field again?

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